Saturday, November 28, 2009

Ronaldo, blissfully unaware (as are most of us) of the dark forces arrayed against him.

Pepe, a 58 year old Mexican trained sorcerer from Malaga, Spain has taken credit for football star Cristiano Ronaldo's recent injury and threatens to end his career in the near future. Pepe claims to be working for a former girlfriend who paid him 30,000 EUR to destroy the Real Madrid star.
In September, Jose “Pepe” Ruz, 58, of Malaga had written to Florentino Pérez, President of Real Madrid: “I have been contracted so Cristiano Ronaldo suffers a serious injury. I can’t promise when that will be, but I can say he will be injured for more time than he plays,” 
Ronaldo knows which former girlfriend is responsible for hiring this bold evil witch. It has been established that it is the ever-ready Paris Hilton. Pepe says he has prepared a voodoo doll of Ronaldo that he shall soon be stabbing with pins. The voodoo doll is a very crude magickal tool. But if Pepe had a sample of Ronaldo's hair or seminal fluid (which the acquisitive powers of Miss Hilton could easily have obtained) it could be effective, although I doubt he learned this trick from his Mexican teacher, if one exists. Perhaps Pepe is providing the voodoo doll story as misdirection from the truly evil rituals he plans. It is the foolish sorcerer who reveals his plans to the world.  Usually a sorcerer for hire (or any other kind) keeps a low profile. Pepe's big mouth could be evidence that he is a fraud; or, it could be a reflection of his overweening pride. It is obvious that Ronaldo has some powerful spiritual allies; anyone in his position would. He needs to be more attentive to them.
How fleeting is love!

Ronaldo's mother, Dolores Aveiro, has hired a "white magician" to protect him from this curse. But we all know there is no such thing as a "white magician". Anyone who presents himself as a "white magician" is attempting to fool his clients or is deluding himself. Cristiano Ronaldo needs to hire a more competent sorcerer. He has the money to hire the best. Ronaldo, get the biggest, baddest, black magician to kick Pepe's ass. Do it now before you regret it.
What this world needs is more Witch Wars out in the open so we all can enjoy them.

If the reader is unaware of this man's skills, see Ronaldo in action here. We note that Ronaldo's former team, Manchester United, was prominently sponsored by the cash-strapped and disgraced AIG. M.U. sold Ronaldo to Real Madrid for £80m in June 2009.

“I can’t stand it when someone is mean, I want a man anyway, not someone who runs about like a little girl. He’s a wimp!”-Paris Hilton, revealing her animosity for Ronaldo in Life & Style 

Quotes from Carlos Castaneda (who, as we all know, was a fraud and a poseur...but who is not?) 1925-1998

"A man goes to knowledge as he goes to war: wide-awake, with fear, with respect, and with absolute assurance. Going to knowledge or going to war in any other manner is a mistake, and whoever makes it might never live to regret it"

"Malicious acts are performed by people for personal gain … Sorcerers, though, have an ulterior purpose for their acts, which has nothing to do with personal gain. The fact that they enjoy their acts does not count as gain. Rather, it is a condition of their character. The average man acts only if there is a chance for profit. Warriors say they act not for profit but for the spirit."

“A warrior considers himself already dead, so there is nothing to lose. The worst has already happened to him, therefore he's clear and calm; judging him by his acts or by his words, one would never suspect that he has witnessed everything.”

“A warrior doesn't know remorse for anything he has done, because to isolate one's acts as being mean, or ugly, or evil is to place an unwarranted importance on the self.”

“A warrior lives by acting, not by thinking about acting, nor by thinking about what he will think when he has finished acting.”

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